Friday, June 29, 2007
30 June, 2007
Missing someone
i read this somewhere :
"when you shower,
or you read a book,
or you listen to a song
and you suddenly remember that someone,
then you know that you have forgotten them."
now that i think about it, it seems quite true. except that forgetting someone don't mean that it don't hurt anymore. the pain will always be there after all.
my only consolation is that she dosen't seem to hurt bad anymore.
but i can always hope she still has a place for me in her heart, even if it is a small one.
i want her back, but if i do get her back, so what?
all i will do is bring her more misery.
so why bother? but i cant stop this feeling inside me.
its like something that crawled into me, and now is trying to force its way out.
i wish i had a gun or something that i could turn upon it.
maybe i'm the fool for still feeling this way about her and all,
i mean, its been almost 1 1/2 yrs now. but i still cant quite get rid of how i felt about her, about how i still feel for her.
how do you get rid of thoughts?
if only the mind was like a computer, able to be rigidly controlled.
then there would be so much less misery in the world.
but its an imperfect world we live in after all...
filled with such imperfect people...although some seem like the perfect ones.
should i ever go and look her up again?
i fear she will become a friendly stranger to me if i try to get close to her again.
then i would truly be devastated.
but then my existence now is not really much better.
the misery daily, everyday after endless day till the end of my days.
so readers, you tell me. what should i do?
dammed if i do, dammed if i don't.
"Ah yes, love. That most terrible of bonds. But which is so easily severed."
(Pirates Of The Carribean : At World's End, Capt' Davy Jones. Prior to death)
it would have been alright if i never heard of saw u ever again.
but there always seems to be something to remind me of you.
and those things reopened old wounds.
to have fallen so deeply in love with you, was i the fool or were we the fools?
(Obtained from a friend's blog)
im not supposed to love you.
im not supposed to care.
im not supposed to live my life
wishing you were there. <-------------i like this little bit
im not supposed to wonder
where you are or what you do
im sorry, i cant help myself
cos im in love with you.
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stupid emo kia. haha....i still think im really just too damm emo sometimes sia...but i cant quite help it...its just me.
the rest later.
JRomy 17 yrs, 6 ,months and 30 days <---------talking abt this down there[1]
*btw readers, if you guys can guess what im counting down to, you get something nice from me at christmas. =] [1]
JEROME signs off
@10:45 AM.
